Sorry, that was all I could think after a day like today. Sure, it was boring by all standards. Sure, it involved a 3 hour trip to the GI. Sure, it involved nursing in the house.
However, it ALSO involved our daughter weighing 9.3 KG… now for those of us who go by pounds? That is 20lbs 7ounces!! That? Is a 12 OUNCE gain in 11 days!!! She has not gained that much in 11 months! I cannot even believe it! She is doing so so amazing. Even amidst what seemed like a dramatic week. She is just thriving!!!
Have I said it already? Hardest decision ever but also one of the best we have ever made. I cannot believe how much has changed in less than two weeks. I wish more people knew about the reality of a g-tube instead of just seeing it as the end. I wish that people could see my child, who used to spend hours a day screaming at meal times, happily getting pushed around in a stroller while she eats. I wish they could see her getting a chance to play with food. To touch, taste, squish, etc. A chance to do all that without her mother panicking as she tries to calculate how many calories are actually going into her. I wish people openly talked about the fact that it does not take anything away from a person to have a g-tube placed. A g-tube simply gives an additional way to take in food. It gives us a chance to stop making food about force and start letting it be about FUN! When my child has 520 calories before noon strikes, then I don’t have to worry that she is short on nutrition. I can let her play with her food and take it as something she is controlling. Seriously? This was just what we all needed. I only wish that I knew more sooner. I only wish that I could see the future. Just a peek. If this last 11 days is any indication of what’s to come… well I am pretty gosh darn excited!!
There are still things that irk. Like the smell of tummy acid. LOL. Thank goodness Ms. T hooked us up with an awesome attachment for her tube today so the syringe stays in place. Our GI appointment went well. She can take a bath again which is exciting. She is healing well. We should be able to have her ‘button’ placed in about six weeks. That way she can get back to crawling. Meanwhile? She is doing so well about not being able to crawl around. She spends time in the stroller, the high chair, our arms, etc. Overall, she is well occupied and I think just so happy to have a full and settled tummy. I cannot wait to see what the future has in store for her. I seriously think this will be the time we look back on as pivotal in her development. For the first time in a long time… she is getting everything she needs … and not having to put up a fight to get it 🙂
A few pics from the day…
Brunch on the go with Cait 🙂 . The Teal/Beige square that is attached to the stroller is her pump. It gives her the amount of food we set it to in the amount of time we set it to. For instance, during the day she gets 4oz in an hour, but over night she only gets a bit more than 1oz an hour.