and it is certainly not going to be the easiest of roads. I know that it is going to take time. We’ve decided we will give all of the supplements, milk, etc one month to reestablish our “normal.” Afterall, there is going to be detoxing, digestive stuff that has to rebuild, and all that fun and exciting stuff that comes with reworking your child’s entire diet.
Last night was not easy. I put 1 part water and 1 part milk into the feeding pump and let us just say that 330am-500am was a long hour and a half. I stopped the feed after that and called it good. We slept past 8 which surprised me a bit since I had pulled Alyssa into bed with me after the “excitement” of the midnight waking and there is sun that comes directly over the bed. At any rate, after the few hours of cuddly sleep I felt better. In the middle of the night I was feeling discouraged and defeated. However, I know full well that this will not be an overnight *fix* but I am confident that long term it will be better than we could ever imagine.
Luckily, despite doing a lot of processing we are also surrounded by our amazing friends. My friend Cheryl’s 4-year old has been so good to Alyssa. Seriously the way he loves her makes me a little teary. He’s been such a good helper. He gets so excited when I mix her meds. He comes over and sits beside me and pushes the meds from the little syringes into her G-tube syringe. It cracks me up how much he enjoys helping. Then, this morning while we were letting her tummy settle he opened a book and started “reading” to her… my heart was a puddle as Alyssa listened so intently to his reading. 🙂
The day wore on and mixing the milk 3 parts water to 1 part milk she tolerated quite a bit of fluid. She actually passed out in the center of the living room with 3 adults talking and 3 kids playing. Alyssa is not a kid who wants to sleep through things. So, I’m starting to get really excited for her little body to detox and heal. As hard as this is, I feel so much better knowing that what we were doing was “wrong.” I know, that sounds silly! The reality of it is that since we were doing something “wrong” then we have the opportunity to do things “right!” Afterall, if Dr. Tish had simply told me the same things we’d heard for years? I’d still feel just as lost as I did three days ago!
As silly as it may sound I’m relieved to know we were wrong and now we can start working on making things right! We made it to 6PM this evening without her vomiting and since I’m going to be out of the house this evening I’m going to give her tummy a rest and skip the overnight feed. I’m thinking a good night of sleep will do her well.